Childhood is one of the most beautiful phases of our lives. Our experiences during childhood play a significant role in defining what kind of individuals we become. While many have a blessed childhood, a lot of us might also have faced struggles during this time, which we carry on our shoulders for the rest of our lives. Let’s check if you, too, carry some baggage and need to drop it off.
Seek constant validation from others
People around us might make us feel undervalued during our childhood. One of the common cases is bullying or craving for a parent’s attention and affection. This decreases the child’s overall confidence and self-worth. At that time we might not be able to stand up for ourselves but as life goes on, these memories and emotions stay with us. During adulthood, when we encounter situations that are not in our favor, the same emotions might rush and we tend to over-explain our worth which might portray anxiety or try to run away from situations. Sometimes it might also make you a people pleaser which can result in lowering your healthy standards and cause suffering later.
Understand that your worth is not limited to what was perceived by you and others when you were a child. Often, we tend to carry forward our parent’s personalities by default. Parents, too, are just another humans like us. Do not limit your life to other’s experiences. Imbibe good teachings of others but never stop self exploring.
Do not rely solely on constant validation from others. Activate the power of self-belief while tackling such situations and give your best.
Struggle during ‘Conflict of interest’ situations
Some have an easier childhood where the major hardships are already taken care of. Having such belief creates an understanding that the set of rules or upbringing style that was followed during childhood are the only ones which we should abide by. We become reluctant to accept different sets of ideas or differently raised individuals who come with a different point of view. We try to become over-controlling about our relationships and other aspects of life, which usually deteriorates the situation. Being so strictly adhered to our upbringing, we refuse to accept diversity in ideologies and might struggle to trust and develop new relationships in life. Life is large. People are diverse. Selflessness still exists to overpower all the negativity. To live a wholesome life, one must be open to new opinions and ideas while maintaining healthy boundaries.
Too much Self-involvement which you regret later
As children, when we face unfavorable situations that are not in our control, there is a possibility that we might develop insecurity as one of our personality traits. For every new situation, we struggle to accept new changes required in life and become habitual to link it to own comfort zone or well-being. Our mind is constantly calculating the risk involved in executing this new change in life. Instead of handling the challenges in life independently, we link them to our own insecurity and fail to address them from a broader perspective. As a result, we do not give the best in us to provide an effective solution to the problem. Later, this invites regret to us by being so self-involved and not being present in the moment.
Childhood is undoubtedly special, but do not restrict yourself to the beliefs you developed during that time. Explore life and use your complete potential to transform yourself into bringing out the best individual version of YOU.